The world according to Riff.

random blog, little politics, little humor...lotta bull****

2009/5/13

A few things I learned watching cops

@ 04:11 PM (6 months, 14 days ago)
1..Stupidity is not an excuse, your still busted
2..Mullets are still a fashion statement..a bad one
3..If you are shirtless, sporting a mullet  with multiple tattoos, and drunk, you are probably the prime suspect
4..Criminals rarely get good dental care
5..Tazers hurt
6.. Fighting cops is painfull, if your lucky you refer to number 5
7..Dropping your "in da hood" slang and over enunciating your words and saying "sir" every sentence, doesn't convince the cops you are    innocent
8...You cant outrun a helicopter on foot in an open pasture...see number 5
9..Don't do crack
10..Don't flag down an officer and tell them "they took my crack money", and expect them to get it back for you.
11..Tube tops on big women should be outlawed, along with a bare midriff/dewlap
12..Take the cigarette out of your mouth when getting taken down
13..Every caught perp, has  "good friend" that they entrusted dearly, that they just met and don't know the name of.
14..There does not seem to be a lot of doctors, lawyers, or nuclear scientist, or highly educated people getting busted for grand theft auto
15..Bait cars are funny as hell
16..Big men scream like a little bitch when tazed...see number 5
17..It's always a good idea to listen to the armed officer when he/she tells you to get down...see number 5...again
18..My life aint that bad at all
19..Drug dogs are not easy to fool, and bite like hell, and run faster than you
20..last but not least.....I don't want to be a cop....but god bless those brave souls that do, and pray they come home alive every day

p.s.......see number 5.....lol....riff

Comment(s) »

  1. Have you ever watched that car repo show on cable? It gets repetitive quick but is a howl the first run through.

    Comment by Ed— 2009/05/13 @ 05:27 PM — (Reply)

  2. everytime i watch that repo show it seems staged

    Comment by mos— 2009/05/14 @ 11:06 AM — (Reply)

  3. watched it twice. Funnnnnnny. Riff

    Comment by riffran— 2009/05/13 @ 05:30 PM — (Reply)

  4. I bet Duggie has sported a mullet at least once in his life. Burnsie did for sure BEFORE he went to wearing that "rug".

    Comment by Ed— 2009/05/13 @ 05:31 PM — (Reply)

  5. Business in the front party in the back. Rofl ....... Riff

    Comment by riffran— 2009/05/13 @ 05:57 PM — (Reply)

  6. innocent until proven guilty in a court of law .. filmed before a "Live" audience ! hahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/13 @ 08:35 PM — (Reply)

  7. Ever sport a mullet yourself Jimbo?

    Comment by Ed— 2009/05/13 @ 09:07 PM — (Reply)

  8. No. Ive always had a Regular haircut. Even to this day. First time I saw that I didnt know it was called anything at all Not until I heard it mentioned about billy ray cirus.

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/14 @ 10:25 AM — (Reply)

  9. I hated doing Repo work ! I sold my wrecker business and the wrecking yard I used to have back in the 80's it just got to dangerous People always wanting to stab, shoot or other wise kill cause they didnt understand If you dont make the payments the car isnt yours anymore ! the repo man gets it back for the bank ! I picked up a van once and the homeless person sleeping inside started the van up and drove the van off my repo prongs when I crossed over a drive way bump ! Damn the one that got away ! he circled around where I caught up to him and he stopped and asked me "Who the hell are you" ? I said "I'm the repo man mother f#%*ker" !

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/14 @ 01:30 PM — (Reply)

  10. I'm the repo man ! Theres a song there somewhere !

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/14 @ 06:21 PM — (Reply)

  11. Perhaps to the tune of the Rolling Stones song "When the Ritz comes down" ?

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/14 @ 06:22 PM — (Reply)

  12. It's not too late for your first mullet Jimbo even if it's a rug like Burnsie sports.

    Comment by Ed— 2009/05/14 @ 08:27 PM — (Reply)

  13. I went from Cousin It, to Cousin It with eyes, to the Belushi/QuiGon Jin Samauri ponytail - to (gasp) a mullet - but in my defence - I had one before it was even known as a mullet - and it was my old lady's fault. She knew if she could get me to compromise and fuck it up that I'd end up cutting it all off. So then I ended up with a high and tight buzz cut, and finally now I'm incognito as one of the normal boring dad like people.
    I love to threaten to grow it back and go for the old Harley dude look when she's pissing me off.

    Comment by The Dudeler— 2009/05/14 @ 08:45 PM — (Reply)

  14. Where is Burns mullet look ? I dont see it ?

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/14 @ 09:03 PM — (Reply)

  15. Not the Burnsie mullet look Jimbo, the Burnsie "rug" look.

    Comment by Ed— 2009/05/14 @ 09:16 PM — (Reply)

  16. Oh .. Some how I missed the resembelence !

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/14 @ 09:34 PM — (Reply)

  17. Tell me that's NOT a "rug" Jimbo.

    Comment by Ed— 2009/05/14 @ 09:46 PM — (Reply)

  18. Burns has the same kind of Clean Cut as I do ? Sorta ! I have a LOT LESS hair today as I used to have. My barber Charges me MORE to trim my facial hair then he does to trim my Head of hair. I seen the picture of you ED fishing with the senator. It would appear you have quite a lot yourself ? Unless the picture is not recent ? could it be ancient ?

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/15 @ 07:14 PM — (Reply)

  19. #21 Criminals dont Lease apartments in thier names ! Thats where moching off a Girlfriend comes in handy !

    Comment by jim— 2009/05/15 @ 07:16 PM — (Reply)

» Leave a comment


:mrgreen: :neutral: :twisted: :arrow: :shock: :smile: :???: :cool: :evil: :grin: :idea: :oops: :razz: :roll: :wink: :cry: :eek: :lol: :mad: :sad: :!: :?:

Preview:

You say:

To prevent spam, please type in the exact word you see in this image: CAPTCHA
To refresh the image, click here. Otherwise, contact us.

  • Your E-mail address is never displayed. If you enter it, it will only be visible to the blog author
  • Since there already are comments to this post, your eventual comment might trigger a notification e-mail to the persons that commented before you.
  • The line and paragraph breaks automatically